Sorry, I know we were meant to deport a bunch of immigrants to a concentration camp for the crime of having brown skin today, but it turns out I’ve been ripped by the news media. Yeah, unfortunately, I won’t be able to commit hate crimes with you anymore.

The apocalypse is not a bad thing in his mind, it’s a planned thing.

I only know of one Weird Al, but in my mind, this is a job creation opportunity. There could be a whole new industry built around taking regular Als and turning them weird.

Free popcorn and squeezy cheese for everyone. Free them! Narf!

MAGA: We need to protect the nuclear family.

Trump: Yes, the nuclear family. What a big, beautiful family. No one knows nuclear like me. My uncle -