Source: comedy writer Zach Dunn. Giving credit is cool.
Rebecca ass is shockingly tame for old James Bond
Pussy Galore is unironically a character name in Goldfinger (1964)
Bonus fun fact: In the original book Pussy Galore is a lesbian who who gets raped straight by James Bond’s magical penis.
It was a simpler time …
😬
Thats pretty much how it happens in the film too.
Such a romantic
One of the films (Thunderball maybe) starts with him raping a nurse.
Aside from Pussy Galore, another favorite inappropriate Bond moment I enjoy is from The Man with the Golden Gun. Bond approaches an Asian woman skinny dipping in a pool and asks her for her name.
She responds: “Chew Mee”
Bond: “Really!?..”
This one is kinda funny tho
Definitely funny!
She needed to get something off her chest.
There was a movie named Octopussy
I thought that’s the one Pussy Galore is in?
No, the name of the character is just Octopussy.
Presumably she has like eight of them down there. One for every day of the week, and a bonus for special occasions.
She reserves #8 for high holy days
Pussy Galore was in Goldfinger.
Strike that. Reverse it.
I like that, even in-universe, in 1964, Bond’s first reaction to that name is “I must be dreaming”. So it’s not like the filmmakers weren’t aware of how absurd that name is. They just didn’t give a shit.
James Bond: The name’s Bond. James Bond.
Xenia Onatopp: Xenia Sergeyevna Onatopp.
James Bond: Onatopp?
Xenia Onatopp: Onatopp
I love a lady who enjoys pulling rank.
I never read them, but the filmakers were just adapting books by Ian Fleming into movies after they found out how successful they were doing. 50 shades of grey was based off a Fan Fiction novel wasn’t it? And those movies came out what I would consider recently.
I think mainstream media just converted Bond into an Icon that was supposed to be more upstanding than he originally was meant to be.
The lastest plays on Bond were the Kingsman. Where a princess tells the main character he can fuck her in the asshole if he saves the world, and he just basically says brb.
Yeah, but book Bond and movie Bond are two rather different Bonds. I think Timothy Dalton probably got closest to depicting the literary Bond onscreen, but in so many words: the books are a fair bit darker in tone than some of the movies, and secondly (something Dalton thankfully did not channel), they’re exceedingly racist. Yes, even more racist than You Only Live Twice let’s-make-Sean-Connery-Japanese racism. One chapter of Live and Let Die set in Harlem NY is titled, I shit you not, “[n-word] Heaven”.
What’s racist about the japanese Connery? I only remember him dressing in a kimono.
He literally puts on Japanese face. His eyes are done up and everything.
Connery was the one they asked if he slapped his wife around and responded something like your damn right I did, and if you ask her, she’ll tell you she deserved it. The public was fine with that response, and Fleming wrote the Bond series years before. I looked it up to double check, Fleming was born 12 years before Women got the right to vote. And he died around the time the Jim Crow laws were abolished. Racism and Sexism were likely very prevelant in his life.
And is where Austin Powers got the idea for Alotta Fagina
Dixie Normous
And Ivana Humpalot
No that’s based on Xenia Onatopp
Onatopp?
Onatopp
How about the twins?
Fook Mi and Fook Yu.
You’re on your way to a smack-bottom, and I don’t care who knows it!
Twins, Basil.
And this is why I’m not bothered by Amazon taking it over.
James Bond has always been bizarre with tone. Each Bond is different. As long as they’re not as Bourne-y as Craig’s then I’ll be fine. But them stealing bonds quips and gadgets and women… The fuck? You made British Jason Bourne with more trauma and less of an ability to cope with it.
Craig has actually said that the serious tone was a reaction to Austin Powers existing. It was too on the nose.
Which is just cowardice
As long as they’re not as Bourne-y as Craig’s…
Yeah. The Venn diagram of good Bond has a bit of Austin Powers and Inspector Gadget overlap, not Bourne.
The opening of casino royal is about as borne as it should get.
Craig was more like the Bond books I thought? A few of the earlier ones like On Her Majesty’s Secret Service followed the books, but the rest were way out there. I don’t think I’ve seen any of the Craig films all the way through though. I saw part of one on TV.
The Craig films certainly showed the more cold, gritty side of Bond that was portrayed in the books, but that wasn’t really the intent of the earlier films. The earlier films were made more lighthearted and fun on purpose, really only following the books for the basic story. Even Brosnan’s Bond still kept a bit of the whimsical nature to an extent, though they certainly were catering to the 90s action audience. Craig’s Brosnan more crossed into psychological thriller in my opinion, and I wasn’t too big on them.
whimsical nature
Which is why my favorite Daniel Craig Bond moment is the Casino Royale naked torture scene. Bond telling the torturer to hit him again, then laughing because he’s “scratching my balls” is peak whimsy (within the new Bond universe).
I want my Bond to be a bit silly, and that was sadly the only time they did it.
100% agree. Half the reason I love the old Bond movies was because they were so goofy, along with some good action scenes and a fun storyline. The new stuff just strikes me as big budget boxoffice grabs. They aren’t bad, but they aren’t 007. That said, the newer Casino Royale was miles better than the 1967 version. I love Peter Sellers, but that movie tried way too hard and failed miserably.
What do you get if you overlap the other three? deadpool maybe
A different tone isn’t what we should be worried about, it’s that they’ll turn it into Russo brothers shit like Citadel. The only reason Fallout was good is because it’s Nolan/Joy in charge.
Moonraker.
Your argument is invalid.
Being shit is sort of part of Bond tradition
Edit: This comment was meant to be jokey but re-reading it, that tone isn’t really achieved.
My point was just that Bond movies have a series of being all over the place. I mean we have gotten a lot of insane bullshit in the past. And while the original movies were more ‘serious’, they also had way more camp and fun than the Craig ones do. I love the Craig ones for what they are but they’re a very gritty take on Bond. I just hope it doesn’t become the default.
I rewatched them all when Amazon added them a few years back.
There are precious few good Bond films. A lot of them are quite generic, and the later Brosnan movies especially bad. The appearance of Madonna in anything is never a good sign.
What’s most surprising is that there was nearly as big a gap between Spectre and No Time To Die as the entire Brosnan era.
I love the Brosnan movies but they’re not particularly good. Was just my entry point to Bond and I want to fuck the shit out of the man so that helps. Roger Moore though… my favorite. And both of those Bonds made some of the worst Bond movies but they also had the suave down for me like no one else did.
I do have a fondness for the Moore era.
Growing up in the 80s, he was my generation’s Bond, and every bank holiday or Boxing Day movie was nearly always one of his.
The zoom to the scarecrow in Live and Let Die scared the crap out of me as a kid though.
Rewatching, they’re mostly objectively bad. I do have respect for him leaving the role, because being paired with women young enough to be his granddaughter was making him feel icky.
Sure, but I’d rather watch an earnestly bad Moonraker than some algorithm driven streaming slop like The Tomorrow War or The Electric State. The argument isn’t that all Bond movies are good, it’s that modern blockbusters are empty.
And there are plenty of Bond movies that are empty. Tomorrow Never Dies is the first example that comes screaming into mind.
I just think you’re all getting insanely defeatist about something that hasn’t occured yet.
Sometimes I wonder if all the James Bonds are the same person, or if “James Bond” is like “The Dread Pirate Roberts”.
Poor fella lost his wife on his wedding day. He has loads of trama of his own.
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service the second actor to play the role gets beaten up, after which he says “this never happened to the other guy!”
Do with that what you will…
I think they’re all the same.
In Evil Genius 2, John Steele becomes that though.
Oh my God, Becky…look at your butt.
